The Building Of Self Confidence

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The building of self confidence is something that takes place over time. It is something that can be learned and grown regardless of if you are an introvert or extrovert. Granted, extroverts may have an easier time exuding their confidence to others, but introverts can still convey themselves as confident individuals to others in many ways. Being confident doesn’t mean you’re loud and obnoxious which is sometimes what people think of when they think of someone who is confident. This can sometimes mean the exact opposite of confidence because the individual may be longing to be heard by someone and get the approval they seek from others. Real confidence comes from within. It isn’t about who is the loudest or who says the most, it’s about who takes control over a room and grabs people’s attention. It is about who brings the most value to the conversation. It is about being humble and acknowledging other people’s opinions and being able to have open discussion without getting aggravated or upset. Confidence is like gravity. When you have it, everyone wants to hear what you have to say and your words and actions pull people in. It is for this reason that it doesn’t matter if you are an introvert or extravert, being confident is something anyone can possess.

The gravitational pull of confidence

Not all influencers, mentors, public speakers, or successful people are extroverts. I would argue that many of them aren’t extroverts at all as a matter of fact. They have just committed themselves to learning the art of talking to people, getting past discomfort, and saying things that have meaning rather than just fill silence. Every word counts for people with confidence. Calculated thought and trajectory are key in allowing people to follow your train of thought. Provoking critical thoughts and saying what they really feel even if it is not the popular opinion shows confidence. They may experience blow back from those who disagree with them, but their persistence will attract people to listen to what they have to say. Confident people are leaders. They are entrepreneurs and team builders. They may not know exactly what they are doing at first, but they aren’t afraid to try, fail, and try again until they make it. Many people don’t possess this ability and gravitate towards confident people who do to guide them to success. Confident people revolutionize the world, but how do you develop confidence in the first place? Are you born with it, or is it something that needs to be learned?

Where does confidence come from?

Confidence can be taught and learned. It’s not just something you are either born with or not. It is a mindset that has to be developed and nourished over the course of time. This is because the vast majority of people lack real confidence and live their lives in fear of rejection or failure so much so that they don’t try anything out of the ordinary. This path is for most people. After all, this is what people are taught in school and the workforce. People who see potential where others see chaos and uncertainty are people who usually exude confidence. They understand that pursuing something that presents risk has the potential to fail, but pursues it anyway. If they fail, they will pick themselves back up and try again. This mindset can be learned as long as you are open to it. Read books, listen to podcasts, and build your arsenal of marketable abilities. Take online courses and programs and learn how to communicate with people. It isn’t enough to just learn these skills though, they need to be put into practice. There is no doubt taking this route in life is harder than the former, but the trials and tribulations will be well-worth the outcome. Through these events, your confidence will proceed you. With every successful endeavor even after countless failures, your confidence will grow. The only way to build up anything, including confidence is to practice and practice until you become a master. The confidence you get from success will boost you to the next level of success and so on. The middle stages of trial and error will make or break you, and emerging victorious from this battle will raise your confidence even higher.

Confidence vs. ego

These two are not the same thing. Having an ego implies you are pompous and look down on others who have not experienced the same success as you. Confidence is a trait that attracts others below you in terms of success to you in order for them to potentially reach the level you have reached. People who are confident extend a helping hand down to those who are not yet at that level. These people usually end up working for the confident person, and together they build a well-oiled machine of a team. The egotistical person drives others away and gives successful people a bad name. Their growth will stagnate because of their lack of empathy, and for not giving back. Because of this, people will associate their successes with evil. People who are egotistical create a negative cloud above the heads of all successful people. This is a very bad thing because it puts in the mind of people who are lacking confidence that success is bad and they shouldn’t associate themselves with it because it makes them greedy and unlikable.

Confident people give back

Being confident is not all about you, it allows you to help others reach your level. Many of these people that are attracted to your personality may want to stick by you and work for you because of the endless invaluable lessons and personal relationship you have given them. To get to this level takes time, patience, and a lot of failure. Educate yourself, have faith in your ability to succeed, and you will reach heights both in confidence and success you never thought possible. Confidence and success go hand in hand so when you work on one, you are in turn working on the other as well!