Confidence is something that is oftentimes misunderstood. It is the popular perception of society that only extroverts can display confidence, however this is not the slightest big true. There are many keys to confidence, most of which I’m still discovering. I have learned over the course of time though that there are many ways to increase your confidence no matter where you are in life in a way that is noticeable to those around you. These suggestions may be simple, but when applied to your life they can make a world of difference for you.
Believe in yourself and your ideas even if no one else does
No idea you have is dumb if you believe strongly in it. You will always be able to find ways to make your ideas and dreams come true if you hold true to your belief in them and yourself. This may sound cliché, but it is hard to have belief in yourself and your ideas if seemingly no one else does. As an example from my life, people around me have cast their doubts about the viability of my blog becoming successful and reaching as many people as I can. Doubts have been thrown at me left and right and this is even with the strong support system that I have (which I am very thankful for). Little by little, my blog is gaining traction as I begin to hire and turn to my marketing manager for advice and adjustments. I am fully confident that I will reach my ultimate vision for my blog and this is because of the firm belief I have in the blog itself and my abilities to be successful at it. Having people who support you no matter what is a great thing to have and I am blessed to have that, but a strong belief in what you do is sure to motivate people to believe in you. This belief demonstrates confidence and confidence is like gravity. The more you have of it without being egotistical, the more you attract people to your side.
Make your voice heard without coming off as rude
Many people fear speaking up and adding input to conversations out of fear of what they say may be embarrassing. They view their input as lower than others, and because of this they don’t ever speak up. Now, I am not suggesting you blurt out whatever is on your mind whenever something pops in your head, but I am suggesting when you have valuable input to add to any situation you should speak up. Adding value to conversations and striking up insightful thoughts is a great way to boost your confidence and make you more likeable. People will want to talk to you more if you have interesting things to say. Don’t hold back on input out of fear that it may be rejected. Whether someone agrees with you or not, they will respect you for saying how you truly feel. This can be done without coming off as rude by following basic communication skills. Don’t interrupt others while they are talking and don’t invalidate them or their opinions especially in front of others. Invalidation does not convince anyone to change their minds about anything or entice them to listen to what you have to say. By eloquently and politely adding your input in conversation that adds value, you will portray to others your confidence and gain their respect all while grabbing their attention whenever you have something to say regardless of if you are an introvert or extrovert.
Compliment people and make them feel good
Making a confident and genuine first impression will make people gravitate towards you in a big way. By striking up conversation beginning with a compliment, it shows the recipient of the compliment that you are confident enough in yourself to a) approach them and b) observe a quality about them that makes them feel good and instantly makes them the center of attention which most people like. Making others feel good about themselves first requires you to feel good about yourself. Developing self-confidence and then projecting that confidence outward to exploit other people’s interests and good qualities will make you very likeable and come off as extremely confident. For some people this comes naturally, but for others it will require a lot of practice. Whether you an introvert or extrovert, mastering the art of the compliment is completely attainable and sure to make a huge impact on your overall confidence by also boosting the confidence of those around you. They say the best way to learn something is to teach it to someone else and confidence works the same way. Make others feel confident and you yourself will become more confident as well.
Speak with conviction
There is nothing that displays a lack of confidence more than a speaker who lacks conviction, or in other words doesn’t seem to believe in what he or she is saying. Speaking quietly, passively, or with hard to follow thoughts will make others less inclined to listen to you and make your confidence levels drop. It is critical to speak your thoughts in a commanding and convincing tone to let others know that what you say is thought out, valuable, and deserves attention. Doing this in a respectful way of course is the goal, but the point is if you want others to take what you say seriously, you must portray that in the way you speak, your tone of voice, voice pitch, eye contact, hand gestures, etc. Over time, you will learn to hone in on and perfect speaking with conviction.
Learn to laugh at yourself
Laughing at yourself is such a difficult thing to do. Whether it be pride, embarrassment, or anything in between, it can be hard to acknowledge when you make a mistake or do something silly and make light of it. This is especially true when one finds themselves in a situation where others are laughing at something they may have done or said. The typical response here is to get defensive and annoyed, but you have the power to determine if these people are laughing at you or with you depending on your reaction. Being able to laugh at yourself especially in the presence of others is the epidemy of confidence. If you can let go of that uptightness that most people have and accept that you make mistakes while making light of them, this can make you into a magnet of confidence that attracts many people to want to be around you.
Extra resources for your benefit
Provided above are just a few keys to confidence and I will be happy to do another post on more keys to confidence in the future. In addition to my advice, I’d like to share with you a resource that has helped me gain a ton of confidence in the past year. This resource is Charisma On Command which is a free YouTube channel. Their advice, tips, and tricks are priceless and invaluable and if you are aiming to improve your confidence and overall charisma in any way, I highly suggest you check them out. I will provide the link to their channel below.
Link: Charisma On Command